Learn to let go of control
During a recent vacation, I picked up Susan M. Campbell’s book “From Chaos to Confidence: Survival Strategies for the New Workplace.” It was an enlightening read. I was specifically struck by his concept of how to practice the art of letting go, and I think you will be too.
Since several of my public speaking / training programs focus on how to handle change in the workplace, I was delighted to see how Campbell’s book supported my beliefs and yet also deepened my own understanding.
His point of view is that we have trouble with change because we don’t approach life or work as continuous learners. We find confidence in what we know instead of continually seeking further understanding / learning, and that ultimately holds us back.
Here’s a quick look at six common ways we block learning by holding on, as shown in Campbell’s book.
- Holding on to a self-perception or habits that no longer serve you.
The main thing we can take away from this point is that all too often we cling to patterns in the way we work and live because we benefit from them, giving us a false sense of security or confidence. These pattern benefits won’t last forever (in fact, they may already have expired), and we must recognize that by persistently trying to learn, we can constantly build new habits that benefit us.
- Fear that the past will repeat itself.
We have all taken risks or we have taken risks and then it did not work out. If we hold onto that fear, we let it propel our careers and lives, which never leads us to our goals! You can’t move on until we leave the past behind.
- Fix our attention on things over which we have no control.
I see this all the time. The key is to pay attention to what you can control and put aside the things that you can’t do anything else about.
- Avoid our feelings through addictive or compulsive habits.
Whether it’s gambling, food, or emotional outbursts, we often give in to the things we can control in our “outer” world when our “inner” world is out of control. These are also aspects of life that we must put aside.
- Suppressing our feelings.
I love this phrase from Campbell: “What you can feel, you can heal. Expressing feelings is a way of letting go.”
- Trying to control other people.
You can never perfectly predict how your co-workers or your manager will act, and you shouldn’t. This is out of your control, and the sooner you can accept it, the better.
I hope you delve into this topic by reading “From Chaos to Confidence, Survival Strategies for the New Workplace.”