The true meaning of motherhood

I remember when I didn’t have my son yet, and I always listened to mothers talk about the things their children did. Sometimes I would get involved in the conversations, but always from the point of view of someone whose experience was babysitting a cousin or a friend’s child. Back then it was almost annoying to be in the company of a group of mothers, because all they did was talk about their children. The conversations would be about; what the child did at any age, the foods he liked or disliked, the sleepless nights that mothers spent when one or more children got sick, etc. So many times the rest of us without children would either be left out and start our own conversations or wander off to find something better to occupy ourselves with.

Later, when I had a child, I realized that these mothers did not intend to leave us out of their conversations; it happened naturally and unconsciously. Unintentionally, I found that I couldn’t stop thinking about my child, if she was okay, if she was well fed and at the right time, or if she had had her diaper changed and things like that. When these are the dominant thoughts in one’s mind, the conversations that follow automatically focus on them.

Motherhood does not stop at giving birth. From the first day of the child’s life, a mother begins to be trained by some invisible power, to feel when a child needs to be fed or changed a diaper. What amazes me to date is how a mother can distinguish the sound of her son’s voice among many other voices. For example, I was always intrigued when in a sea of ​​babies, say on an immunization day in a hospital, a mother left her child with the caregiver and walked to the counter for something. Then, suddenly, several babies begin to cry and, among them, her own crying stands out. Another example is when visitors came to the house, there was a lot of talking and noise, but through that, I could tell when the baby was crying in the bedroom. Checking it, she would have woken up.

Then come the stressful days and nights when a baby has a fever or an infection or a stuffy nose. Oh! Every mother goes through such moments and it is intriguing to note that even without prior training, she will always be alert and on her feet to make sure the baby is as comfortable as possible. I remember one of those days when my son had a temperature above normal; 39°C (Celsius degrees). A normal baby’s temperature is 36.4°C/37°C, depending on whether the thermometer is placed in the ear, tongue, or under the arm. That day, like so many others that followed, she was always checking the baby’s temperature, placing a damp cloth on his forehead to reduce the “burning”. Now, I’ve learned that even when the doctor assured me that everything would be fine, it didn’t stop me from feeling anxious. Usually, a baby will be fine during the day and then seems to get worse at night; hence the mother’s stress levels.

It is the duty of the mother to stay awake most of the night to keep watching the baby. Any slight baby sound from her will wake her up even if the baby is just sighing. When one goes through so many sleepless nights for the well-being of a child, that is true motherhood. It doesn’t end here, as the baby develops through the different stages, there are other challenges along the way that the mother finds herself blending into. This is not to say that motherhood is about the child crying and getting sick. There are many happy moments that are more than the difficult moments.

For example, seeing a baby smile for the first time is a very happy feeling for the mother. I don’t take that for granted because it gives one a warm and comforting moment that lasts forever. The first teeth of a developing child, the first time she crawls, the first time she stands up without support, the first steps, the list goes on. When one experiences all of these things first hand, they stay with the person and cannot be safely changed.

I have also learned that as a child gets older, the mother will worry about whether he is getting a balanced diet. She will make sure that her son has the best education, wears the best clothes, interacts with the right people, and learns good manners. Everything the mother does tends to be for the child in that if one is not careful, she begins to neglect her own welfare. I have seen this happen many times when she would sacrifice buying a good perfume and would choose to buy shoes for my son. Or not buy a type of food that my son does not eat, but something that he will eat with all his heart.

It is true that experience is the best teacher, because even motherhood teaches skills and lessons that are not learned in a classroom.